Canto CCCLX: The Bullies(d)

Gentle cabrones:

When you’re a nerd, the bullies can smell you from miles away.

You can run, but you can’t hide.

They take a perverse pleasure in messing with those they perceive to be weaker than them — the defenseless, the meek. The good. The nerds. They seek fellow bullies — and then try to bully them as well, like Orcs crashing into each other for the right to dominate everything before them.

Bullies? I had a bunch of them.

The one that regularly took my lunch money and the one that once threw a chair at a teacher (the latter guy is now a well-paid, well-positioned public employee in a Southern California — because of course they are). The one that tried to sabotage me at work, and the one that tried to steal my bike and now has a rap sheet as long as my resume.

There was one person who didn’t let up. They hounded me for years. Junior high. High school. College years, even though we were no longer in the same world. To this day, if I see a photo of him or see him out in the word, my fist curls up ala Arthur.

Years later, I found reasons to have pity on the guy — on all of them, really. Horrible home life. Latter ended up a drug addict. Today, a shell of his athletic self. And I’m good.

But tell that to Sycamore Jr. High Gus.

I wish I could say I fought back against all of them — a punch, a zinger — but I didn’t. And yet, I did.

Above all, a bully wants their enemy to live in fear. They want their victim to change their life so that the victim suffers and the bully wins. To bend to their every whim without resistance.

I wish I could say I didn’t live in fear of my bullies — but I did. And yet I didn’t.

I weathered their intimidation, their pantsing during gym, their public mocking. Life was hell during junior high, when the worst of the bullying happened. But then and now, I refused to change who I was, and I forced those who tried to defeat me to deal with me, as me.

Eventually, they left me alone when they realize I would not be beat.

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In my barely read Orange County: A Personal History, I tell a story that mi Tío Ezequiel told me for it.

He went to school at Fremont Junior High in Anacrime, which no longer exists. He had a bully as well. Tormented mi tío daily for weeks, if not months, all because mi tío was Mexican.

Then, one day, the bully had an ultimatum to mi tío: Meet him in a garage, to fight once and for all.

Mi tío showed up by himself. In the garage was the bully and his friends. Mi tío felt he wouldn’t come out of there alive — so he beat the bully to a pulp, then ran away while the bully’s bewildered friends gathered around their fallen fellow goon to figure out what happened.

Mi tío never returned to school again, and has lived one hell of a blessed life. Never did remember the bully’s name, who probably now lives in Idaho.

My tío has the far-better bully story than mine. But we both had the same result: We survived, then thrived — and never forgot our hell.

Bullies will always be on the march. They want to rule. They want to batter. They want to destroy.

We cannot allow them.

Some of us can punch back. Others can’t. But we can all fight back in our own way.

In numbers. In secret. Loudly. Diplomatically. And not. By just being, damn the consequences.

But we must fight.

Bullies tend to win most of the battles — their multiple advantages is what makes them bullies, after all. But bullies inevitably lose. It might not happen immediately, but it WILL happen. Good does win. That’s why all bullied people must resist in their own way — and there is no real wrong way except not to fight, and no real right way other than to do it.

If we don’t each stand, we all will fall.

We are all nerds now. Nerds of the nation, unite!

**

Enough rambling. This was the semana that was:

IMAGE OF THE WEEK: Game 1 of the World Series at Dodger Stadium — no, I didn’t go! This is the vantage point of my Godfather — he’s il capo di tutti capi for a reason among the Mexiclan. What a game!

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: ““If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.” — Art Buchwald

LISTENING: “ El Toro Mambo,” Banda El Jaripeo. If Fernandomania happened today, this would be his walkup song, not ABBA’s too on the button “Fernando.” A banda tour de force, with a sampling of the classic “El Sauce y la Palma” for good measure.

READING: “You Asked for It”: Now that I think of it, I should’ve shared this poem by George Bilgere about inevitable irrelevancy last week! As brutal an ending as you’ll read — and brilliant AF.

BUY MY NEW CO-BOOK! People’s Guide to Orange County tells an alternative history of OC through the scholarship and reporting of myself, Elaine Lewinnek, and Thuy Vo Dang. There’ll be signings all year — in meanwhile, buy your copy TODAY. And, yes: I’ll autograph it!

Gustavo Events  

Saturday, Oct. 26-Nov. 10: Here’s where I plug Interview with a Mexican. There are a couple of performances scheduled, but I’m going to be at the one scheduled for Oct. 26 at 8 p.m. aka TONIGHT and give a few words. See the World Series game at a bar in downtown LA, then walk over! My theater year continues — buy your tickets here!

Nov. 16, 1 p.m.: I’m going to be in conversation with the legendary essayist Ilan Stavans, co-author of Sabor Judío: The Jewish Mexican Cookbook, at my wife’s Alta Baja Market, 201 E. 4th St., Ste. 1010, SanTana. There will be books for sale AND snacks to follow. Lecture, FREE; books, BARATO. in me

Gustavo in the News

“50 Books of the West”: Colorado Sun plugs a book of mine.

“Latinx Files: Long live Fernando Valenzuela”: A Los Angeles Times newsletter you should subscribe to plugs a columna of mine.

“Ready for a pulpy papal potboiler?”: Another Los Angeles Times newsletter you should subscribe to plugs a columna of mine.

“The California chefs who pioneered L.A.’s French-Japanese aesthetic”: Still another Los Angeles Times newsletter you should subscribe to plugs a columna of mine.

“Part 123: An October "Political Gift" – How Los Angeles Lost the Acoustic War”: Legendary whistleblower Zachary Ellison mentions me in a story of his.

“Latino Voters Challenge Political Narratives Ahead Of 2024”: A Turkish newsletter shouts out my “Caminos del Southwest” series.

“California Sun“: The great newsletter of all stories California shouts out a columna series of mine.

“Santa Ana’s mayor’s race”: Supporters of the incumbent manipulate a columna I did quoting candidate (and compa) Ben Vazquez to make him seem like a bad person —BARF.

“The LA Food Podcast”: A plug for a series of mine.

“💙Fernandomania💙”: The KCRW Insider comadre Connie Alvaraz shouts out an appearance of mine.

“Voting for Change: How the Next U.S. Election Will Shape Our Food Systems”: Appearing at another Food Tank event far from my OC home!

Gustavo Stories 

“Composer Carl St. Clair to retire from Pacific Symphony”: My latest KCRW “Orange County Line” commentary talks about the iconic head of OC classical music.

"Gustavo Arellano takes on the myth and reality of Latino political identity”: I appear on the California Sun podcast to talk about my “Caminos del Southwest” series.

“On A Roadtrip Through The American Southwest, LA Times Columnist Asks Latino Voters About Their Hopes And Fears": I appear on KQED’s “Political Breakdown” to talk about my “Caminos del Southwest” series.

“Remembering baseball great Fernando Valenzuela”: A replay of me appearing on WBUR’s “Here and Now” a few years back talking about El Toro.

“Why Fernando Valenzuela’s legacy extends far beyond the pitcher’s mound”: I appear on the Canadian radio show “A Little More Conversation with Ben O’Hara-Byrne” to talk about El Toro.

“Remembering Dodger legend Fernando Valenzuela’s impact on Latino LA”: I appear on “Press Play with Madeleine Brand” to talk about El Toro.

“The life and legacy of Fernando Valenzuela”: I appear on “AirTalk with Larry Mantle” to talk about El Toro.

“Ep. 325: Remembering Fernando Valenzuela”: I appear on Power 106’s “Brown Bag Mornings” to talk about El Toro.

“An American Southwest road trip to find the political soul of Latinos”: My latest L.A. Times “Essential California” newsletter talks about my road trip series that I will highlight soon enough! KEY QUOTE: “So, over seven days— across seven states and nearly 3,000 miles — I found story after story of the Latinos I know: resilient, independent and focused on fixing what’s in front of them instead of being too concerned with the White House rat race.”

“Remembering late Dodgers legend Fernando Valenzuela”: I appear on an L.A. Times video tribute to The Bull.

“Why Fernando Valenzuela’s magic should ensure him a spot in the Hall of Fame”: My latest L.A. Times columna talks about El Toro. KEY QUOTE: “In a sport now reduced to algorithms and pitching clocks, Valenzuela represents more than a team or a career. He was the magic of baseball at its best.”

“What L.A. can learn from this year’s Dodgers”: My next latest L.A. Times columna talks about the Blue Crew and what they can mean to Los Angeles. KEY QUOTE: “They’re the most trusted brand in Los Angeles right now, while City Hall is little more than a joke with no punchline except the wallets of taxpayers.”

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