Canto CCCLXXII: Abono, Abono!

Gentle cabrones:

In the coming days and weeks, I will do all the things I’ve written about before when it comes to my garden, insha’Allah.

I will whittle (Canto CIII). Talachear (Canto CXIX). I will prune (Canto CCCVI) and deal with chiles (Canto CLXXV AND CLVI). Gardening, as I’ve written many times before (Canto XVI as well, and this one basically makes it that I write about the subject once a year) teaches you so many lessons about life, gives you something to do, can feed you and at least pretties your environs.

You know one thing I’ve never written about? Fertilizing.

Plant can grow without fertilizer. Plants can give good bounties without fertilizer. I actually didn’t fertilize many of my plants for years, and I did just fine (I didn’t do it out of some cosmic fear of playing God and messing with the natural order of things — no, seriously). But if you want the best of the best, you need to add a little extra.

I’m not gonna pretend to be a scientist on fertilizing soils. But I can tell you what has worked in my world:

• Everything is different when it comes to citrus: They are finicky bastards that are existentially threatened in Southern California (read my columnas on that) and need a lot of care in their early years. That huge orange tree from your neighbors? Somebody got it to that level — and they did it with the right amount of additional nutrients aka fertilizer. I like to get a mix that I buy at Laguna Hills Nursery, which is actually in SanTana. You apply eight ounces of it four times a year, and it smells like fishmeal, which means Cosmo always wants to eat it, but of course he cannot!

• Abono: The side strip of my front lawn that I ripped up years ago to plant tomatoes every other year will get abono — manure. It’s going to be steer manure that my dad buys from a place off the 57 freeway in Anaheim near Angel Stadium. He’ll get his truck, have them fill the bed, then drive to our cantón and we spread it there. The smell of the barn is LYFE to me, and I like it that our house smells like the barn, even if it’s just a couple of days. Which reminds me: I need to fill up the wheelbarrow tires with air.

• Bat guano: I bought a big bag from Native Seeds in Tucson (back when they had a storefront) right as COVID-19 pandemic shutdowns was starting in earnest five years ago. It did great for my planters and potted plants. Not sure where to get it in SoCal, though, although I’m sure it’s around. But Laguna Hills Nursery doesn’t have it, so I don’t bother.

• Worm castings: Use them exclusively for my tomato plants once I put them in the ground. Does a great job of keeping away pests.

Fertilizer! Fertilizing! Easy, right? Just throw it on and let everything grow!

Yeah, no.

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Fertilizer works best judiciously — this is not a philosophical assessment, but a real-life one.

Use too little fertilizer, and it’ll be a waste. Use too much, and it’ll burn the soil for the season and force you to amend it. Not too soon, not too late.

All in moderation, all with regulation, no exaggeration, no self-abnegation. Now THAT is a life lesson!

The human corollary to fertilizer isn’t vitamins but pleasure. We all need a pick-me-up — get those endorphins flowing, however you like it best. It makes us stronger, it makes us healthier. It makes us more bountiful. But too much of a good thing, as the old saying goes, ain’t. As my dad recently told me, in a line that’s so damning and brilliant and Mexican that it’s gonna appear in an upcoming columna: si fuera tan fácil.

If it were only that easy.

Proper fertilization is straight-up magic, alchemy that is learned and mastered with years of training — and even then, results aren’t automatic. Life is spent trying to nail the proper amount of abono to enrichen: our lives, the lives of others, the whole mankind megillah.

Ready to abonar? Heaven knows this year already needs it. You’re late!

**

Enough rambling. This was the semana that was:

IMAGE OF THE WEEK: Flyer for a car show with La Virgen de Guadalupe since it happened at her namesake school in Eastlos. Not sure if it went on because of the fires. Spotted at La Azteca Tortillería off Cesar E. Chavez Avenue.

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “How will I ever get out of this labyrinth?” — Simón Bolívar’s last words, supposedly.

LISTENING: “Stewball,” Joan Baez. Nothing like a horse ballad from the 18th century to remind you how genius lasts across the centuries, and nothing like an artist like Baez to not only recognize its genius, but also critique it AND make it better with new verses like anyone versed in corrido/ballad traditions would (the Ruffian she mentions in her intro was the greatest filly in racing history before tragically dying in a race in the 1970s). I usually go for studio versions, but this live take is the one — Joan sings it plainly instead of plaintively, letting the lyrics tell the tale while using that siren of a voice appropriately. The recorded version? Overwrought. Oh, and if the melody to “Stewball” sounds familiar, it’s because it is: John Lennon used it for “Happy Xmas (War is Over).” What did I say about genius lasting across centuries?

READING: “A Song for Wall Street”: Nicaraguan poets know how to bring it!

BUY MY NEW CO-BOOK! People’s Guide to Orange County tells an alternative history of OC through the scholarship and reporting of myself, Elaine Lewinnek, and Thuy Vo Dang. There’ll be signings all year — in meanwhile, buy your copy TODAY. And, yes: I’ll autograph it!

Gustavo Events  

Jan. 21: Remember when I used to come out on KPCC’s AirTalk with Larry Mantle every other week to talk Orange County stuff? I do! Well, I’m taking a trip back in time for Larry’s 40th anniversary tour with a taping about OC matters at the Bowers Museum in SanTana! Going to start at 7 p.m, and tickets are FREE, but you gotta RSVP! Postponed indefinitely, alas, as LAist recoups and covers the Eaton fire, especially.

Gustavo in the News

“L.A. wildfires destroy archives of Ethnic Studies pioneer”: My compa Russell Contreras mentions me in writing about one of the many tragedies that have happened in the terrible wildfires that struck Los Angeles last week: the immolation of the papers of my former UCLA professor, Juan Gómez-Quiñones aka GQ.

“Love thy neighbor”: Author/Macarthur genius/profe/comadre Natalia Molina shouts out a columna of mine in her newsletter, which you should totally subscribe to.

“Who’s to Blame for the L.A. Fires?; Please Check Your Aldi Taquitos for Metal–Coachella Valley Independent’s Indy Digest: Jan. 13, 2025”: The last true alt-weekly in Southern California plugs a columna of mine.

Gustavo Stories 

“Grítale a Guti”: Latest edition of my Tuesday night IG Live free-for-all.

“OC community steps up to help LA wildfire refugees”: My latest KCRW “Orange County Line” commentary talks about the connections between two areas that tend to not care for each other.

“How L.A. County Supervisor Kathryn Barger plans to help Altadena rebuild”: My latest L.A. Times columna talks about the supe chair in a walkthrough of a fire-ravaged area. With a cameo by author/Macarthur genius/profe/comadre Natalia Molina! KEY QUOTE: “She adjusted her sunglasses, which complemented her pearl earrings and necklace. ‘Everyone I’ve met when I’ve been here has lost their homes. Everyone. Everyone.’”

“U.S. Atty. E. Martin Estrada steps down, looks back at his ‘labor of love’”: My next latest L.A. Times columna talks about a good lawman. KEY QUOTE: “‘I don’t like leaving things undone. But I don’t really have my choice here, so I got to go.'”

“‘When am I gonna come back?’ A lifelong Clippers fan sees them in person for first time”: My still next latest L.A. Times Sports columna sees me going to the Intuit Dome with NELcyn. KEY QUOTE: “I was happy he was happy, but was afraid my compa’s first game would be a blowout loss. Then the Clippers came alive.”

“Why everyone shares the same quotes about wildfires and Santa Anas”: My yet still next latest L.A. Times columna mentions Chandler/Didion/Davis/West, of course — and the people I talk to urge more. KEY QUOTE: “This time around, though, so many folks have posted the same quotes to the point that the brilliant is becoming banal. In the face of so much suffering, why do so many regurgitate the regurgitated?”

“The shrine to Mexican horse culture that’s now a sanctuary from the fires”: My even yet still next latest (and to compete the author/Macarthur genius/profe/comadre Natalia Molina shoutout trifecta in this canto: she once told me how she always cracks up when I pile on the adverbs if I have a piece in the same publication in the same week; I responded that I lovingly borrowed the schtick from a MAD Magazine article) L.A. Times columna goes to the Pico Rivera Sports Arena. KEY QUOTE: “‘These guys aren’t comfortable,’ said Fernando Jr. as he approached the evacuees. The 20-year-old heads La Noria Entertainment’s charrería team. ‘They want to go home.’”

You made it this far down? Gracias! Follow me on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram while you’re down here by clicking on their logos down below. Don’t forget to forward this newsletter to your compadres y comadres! You can’t get me tacos anymore, but you sure as hell can give them — and more — to the O.C. Catholic Worker!